Brazzers

The Brazzers network may be the most widely known name in porn today. Even if you're just a casual porn watcher (I know you're not, you're a fucking pervert), you've probably heard of Brazzers. Famous for delivering some of the sexiest pornstars, well-executed extended scenes. It also probably doesn't hurt that almost every free porn site on the web seems to have advertising space.

Brazzers was started in 2005 by a group of Montreal investors and then became a subsidiary of conglomerate Mindgeek, which ranks him alongside Pornhub and Redtube, the other giants of the adult video industry. Brazzers has won multiple AVN (Adult Video News) awards each year since 2009 and has been highly acclaimed. Among the many awards are Best Adult Website, Best New Video Production Company, Best Big Bust (Big Tits at School) and Best Membership. Website, Best Art Direction (Storm Kings). You'd be hard-pressed to find a more consistently top-notch member network today.

I've always wanted to see for myself what the hype is all about, so I finally decided to subscribe. There are also some things I would expect to be much better. So without further ado, let's get started.

Can porn sites give you blue balls.

There is palpable excitement when you log into a new paid porn site for the first time, especially one with a reputation like Brazzers. But as soon as you enter your username and password and complete the silly little Recaptcha test (which image contains a bus? Brazzers, I don't know which image contains a tight pussy Can you tell me?), I was redirected to the portal instead of the Brazzers home page.

Soon they're trying to sell me more shit, like bundling packages with other studios like Reality Kings, Mofos, and Digital Playground. There are Latina Channels, Teens Channels, and Mature Channels. Confused and quickly losing my nerves, I clicked on Teens' channel, thinking Bros might be curating the content.

it's not. Instead of taking me to all the sexy teen videos Brazzers has to offer, they're already trying to sell me something else. Expect to pay another $60 to do so. You're joking, right? I just signed up for a $10/month, or $120, yearly subscription, but you already want more of my money. Christ of crackers, calm down, you greedy motherfucker.

After clicking through a few more of these bullshit channels, I finally noticed the little menu bar at the top of the site. In addition to 'Channels', there is a drop-down menu for 'Sites', all of which are also locked and require an additional payment to view. Finally, hover your mouse over "Network". I'm completely relaxed at this point, but another drop-down menu has a link to Brazzers.

Alright, good, now you can find some great videos to masturbate to without interruption. That's what I thought. I'm glad you've successfully hunted down and found the official Brazzers site and all of its content, but there are still bundled ads. For the price I'm paying, at least I should be able to watch my porn in peace. Step up your fucking game.

More ads. But you already have my fucking money.

I am also not overly impressed with the layout and design of the website. His two vertical banner ads for the content they're focusing on this week. We accidentally clicked on the right side of the screen and we see a trailer for his season finale of Brazzers House, albeit not the full video. This trailer doesn't even show him 9 days 11 hours 36 minutes. , and 50 seconds (due to an additional countdown clock at the top of the page).

Who knew paying for porn would actually make it harder to watch fucking porn.

Below and in between all the offensive ads on the home page are some videos. Emphasize the word "some". I don't know about you, but I think the main focus of a website like Brazzers is actually viewable content. no. Instead, there are three categories of him: "Latest Scenes," "Most Popular Scenes of the Week," and "Upcoming Scenes," each with four of his videos. To see more than 5 videos in each category, you have to click on another page.

Under these three little sections, the homepage also has links to "Brazzers Live Cams," "Recently Active Pornstars," and "Our Partners [technically another fucking ad]." I decided to check out the live cams.I want to know if any of their pornstars have ever made an appearance.But wait, what is that? Another Brazzers feature wants you to pay extra. Now i'm pissed.

Ok, now we're there. Maybe.

I wasted 15 minutes trying to find all this great porn that Brazzers seem to be hiding somewhere. Return to the home page again and try your luck with "Latest Scenes". Alright, looks like we've gotten somewhere. There are still too many ads above, next to, and below the search results, but at least you now have 4+ fucking videos to choose from.

There's a good filter function above the search results, allowing you to organize your scenes by release date, rating, most views, title, or "frustration" which shuffles the order. I don't know, I really don't know what it does. You can also filter by model name or tag (you can also use tags in combination with each other, which is really nice).

Oh there you go...

The content is 100% perfect. You can tell that people at Brazzers respect pornography as an art. They aren't just putting out cheap smut for the lowest common denominator. The production quality of their videos is great, the cinematography is thoughtful, and the women are just gorgeous.

One of the things I especially love about Brazzers content is the fact that they continue the tradition of story-based porn. In today's era of mass porn consumption, the emphasis on porn storylines seems to be fading a bit. Thankfully, quality studios like Brazzer still exist. Sometimes it's nice to have a little backstory to keep you immersed in fantasy. Sometimes you simply don't want to fuck a tight asshole. Sometimes I want to know that the tight asshole I'm fucking with is my mean girlfriend's hot roommate's after she finishes yoga in front of me.

Brazzers has content that you can easily slide into the story. There are also many scenes.

Is it worth paying?

Taking all this into consideration, we come across a final question: are Brazzers worth the money. Sure, there is some great quality content out there that will be granted access as soon as it's ready for release. But on the other hand, what you get for your money doesn't seem to quite live up to the sheer amount of hype surrounding this studio.

While we appreciate paying for a great product rather than settle for low-quality cheap (or free) content, a Brazzers subscription is well worth it.

My biggest suggestion to Brazzers: Stop trying to sell me more shit when you already have my damn money. Oh, improve your website layout and navigation.

In that regard, over the next few months I'll probably see Brazzers (often misspelled as "brazers", "brazzars", "berazzers", "brazzera", "brezzers", "brazzerz") quite frequently. I think I will explain it in. To make sure you get your money's worth. As a matter of fact, I am going to do it now. Happy fapping you motherfucker.